We need to hear from scam victims, have you been scammed after joining an online dating site?
Have you received requests for money from someone you met on a dating site but realised it’s a scam before sending money?
Some of the victims stories we are currently receiving are heartbreaking but there is little practical help we can offer to victims after the scam has taken place.
We are currently considering starting a new blog dedicated entirely to educating potential online daters of the dangers and warning signs of scams but before we spend time and money on this project we need to hear from you.
Please leave a comment (or use the “ask a dating question” link at the top of this page) answering these simple questions to help us decide whether such a blog would help people avoid being scammed:
1. Did you do any research online about the dating site you joined before you joined?
2. If you did do research what did you type into your search engine (eg name of dating site+reviews or does “name of dating site” work?).
3. After you joined the dating site did they send any information to you about how scams operate and how to avoid them?
4. Did you read any of the newsletters or admin emails sent by the site, about any topic, or did you just delete/ignore them?
5. Can you think of any delivery method which would have given you information about online dating scams before you joined a dating site or were you just too excited to get started once you made the decision to join a dating site?
We would really appreciate your answers to these questions so we can try to find a way to help people before they are scammed and not just after they have become a victim.
Thanks for any replies we receive. We are currently having a problem with the comments sections which we are trying to fix, so if you try to leave a comment and get a blank page please use the Ask a Dating Question link right at the top of the blog to send your answers by email, because we really need to hear from dating scam victims.
June 19th, 2010 at 4:35 am
Helly Sally
It is good to read from you again on such an important subjet as this one. When I first got to your site was mainly after looking online for “dating frauds” as I was just tried to be scammed after putting my profile on match.com . I have shared on other themes of your sites some of the emails and documents recived by the scammer but I would like to answer to your questions above to help other people to skip scammers.
1. I did not do a research about the website as I knew it was one of the biggest ones and it was the first one I found when looking for dating sites. I just googled for dating sites and found many including match.com.
3. When I joined them I got a confirmation but never a warning about the scammers, I did not even know scammers were involved in dating sites. I did not receive any newsletter I probably did not want to receive any.
5. It is correct, I was so excited to get started and again, I never even thought scammers were on dating sites.
Now I know I should have done some research before joing any dating site and I hope this blog help others to skip scammers. I think any dating site should warm you about scammers and they should also do the research I did after tying to be scammed and publish a note with the names and email they use. They should also have all these records on their files and denied the access to any scammer trying to use one of these email address which I found after my research and which lead me to your site.
June 22nd, 2010 at 10:11 am
Hi Sally.
Thanks for the post, lots of useful insight here for all potential online daters out there. Truth is, scammers are everywhere, including dating sites. It is quite simply crucial to do research on a dating site before you join. Just do some online searches and visit forums, and read about othere people’s experience. If a site has a bad rep, someone will for sure tell others about it.
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November 4th, 2010 at 2:50 pm
I was scammed in a dating site a few years ago, but I was very naive then. I probably did receive warnings from the site thru email but never bothered to read them. Didn’t do any research either. My passion for the girl just overrided any logic. Just got caught up in the moment and couldn’t believe someone was actually interested in me *GASP* Needless to say, I’ve become a skeptic and probably won’t try any online dating sites in the future.
November 23rd, 2010 at 7:18 am
dear , whoever , due to total stupidity i realise i have just fallen far the oldest con there is , but i cant use a computer well and i have reported my crime to the police only yesterday , i waited at the airport for someone to arrive , he didnt show , i was contacted by police i bailed him out and repaid his ticket and of course now he is nowhere to be found, i should have known better i agree but i had a lot of communication with him prior to these events , i make no excuses for myself and the money has gone , i gave it to him , he didnt exactly steal it , but apart from the mopney , i am not coping with the humi liation , the cruelty and i need answers as to why ,i know i am a victim of my own stupity but i really was just helping another human being , thank you for being there. sandy
December 13th, 2010 at 7:42 am
It is sad to hear some of these stories. I am surprised people get taken, but then again I have to remind myself everyone is not as skeptical and cynical of things. Even not being cynical though people need to learn common sense when it comes to such scams. My friend used to have me run a dating website for him and it was a full time job deleting fake profiles and posting warnings to users about their scams.
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December 14th, 2010 at 12:21 am
I was joined be2.com and they didnt inform me about any danger. I decided to have a paid subscription because it a big dating website.
The scammer user name is gphil400. Email: graham.phils.co.uk. He said he was a civil engineer, widow and had a 10 year old daughter named Sophia. Lived in Harrow, UK. After 3 weeks of chatting online, he said he needed travel to Nigeria to supervise a construction site. Few days later, his daughter got malaria, his credit card was blocked and he needed money to pay for medical bills!! I did some research, and couldnt verify any of the info he gave me. Didnt loose any money, but now I would like to warn the person whose pictures were used to scam me. Maybe he was a victim also, just trying to find his soul mate. Its hurtful, and I feel ashmed… I even made a channel on YouTube, I dont know if I will succeed, but at least I’m trying…