Most people worry about what to wear on a first date and spend half the day trying on every outfit in their wardrobe to see which looks best. People want to look sexy and attractive on a first date but they also tend to fall into the ‘visual trap’.
Remember that humans have more than one sense, visual is just one of the ways we receive information and pleasure, which is why we wear perfume on dates. A lot of the flirting game is taken up by touch with little brushes against someone that excite the senses.
Women will more often than not choose a dress or blouse that shows their cleavage to the best advantage and tight fitting skirt or trousers to accentuate their curves.
Men will generally choose trousers and shirt or jumper that they feel best demonstrates their financial success, whether that is through choice of label or style.
These are fine choices, as long as you like to be looked at from afar but what if you want your date to get a little closer?
Put the clothes you are thinking of wearing on your bed, close your eyes and feel them. Do they feel sexy, do you want to put them to your cheek and rub your face in their softness? Do they smell fresh and slightly scented?
You want your date to have to fight themselves not to touch you, not in an outright sexual way but just little brushes against you. They should want to find any excuse to stroke your arm or back as you walk through a door or move past them to go to the bathroom.
You will find if you wear velvet or soft wool that you yourself inadvertently stroke your arm or leg as you speak, simply because of the pleasure you get from the touch of the material, this should have the desired effect on your date and just watch how many times their eyes move to your stroking hand.
The same effect simply cannot be found with jeans, leather or nylon, no matter how much flesh is on show.
A man is less likely to wear velvet but a soft wool jumper or silk mix shirt can have just the same effect when worn by a man.
February 13th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
I think on a first date you should dress more formal then casual. It also depends on what you are doing for a first date as well. You are not going to want to wear a suit to go to a baseball game.
February 14th, 2009 at 3:32 am
Not sure I can entirely agree with you Jason. Of course it depends where you are going and we all want to look our best on a first date but why wear a suit if that is not your normal mode of dress. It may give your date the impression you dress that like all the time. Better in my mind to be clean and tidy but dress to suit your personality.
October 18th, 2009 at 5:12 am
Hi! Fantastic fashion tips for men! I’d love to try wearing velvet and see how the ladies dig it! David
October 18th, 2009 at 8:42 pm
Well David you could always try wearing a soft wool jumper as suggested in the article but if velvet pants is your thing then who am I to argue.
February 4th, 2010 at 8:03 am
I don’t know … I think jeans, leather and nylon can be pretty hot! Jeans and leather, especially, have that feeling of tough self confidence. If that expresses who you are, then why not wear denim or leather? Nylon can be light, fun and party-oriented, so if that’s your personality, why not express it on a date? I do have to agree about scenting the clothes, though – pick something that you love, and then don’t overdo it. Our sense of smell actually relates to and gives input to more parts of the brain than any other sense, including sight and hearing, so it should be a good way to help you make an impression in their mind!
March 23rd, 2010 at 8:32 pm
I’ve got a date on Friday. Someone I’ve been corresponding with for awhile but not met. Effectively a blind date. I think the advice suggested here is spot on. I want to look sexy, but not cheap. I really want to wear a good fitted pair of jeans, a blouse and a pair of boots, but as it’s a Friday night, it might seem a little under dressed. You say to avoid trendy clothes. My alternative was to wear leggings, a long fitted top over them and some pumps. But pumps are flat and look a little casual. Alternatively it’s the fitted top with a pair of tights and high heels. This might look cheap. Oh what a dilemma.
May 3rd, 2010 at 3:03 pm
Hi Lloyd
So sorry I haven’t kept up with my blog as I started a new business and had to concentrate on that for some time.
Hope your date went well and I’m sure you looked great.
May 17th, 2010 at 6:24 am
First date should leave a very good impression. What you wear isn’t usually that important. Casual or formal wear will be just fine. You just have to watch for on how you do well in a date. A simple courteous did is most remembered than how you looked on that day.
sandy @ plus size blouses´s last blog ..Plus Size Silk Blouses
May 17th, 2010 at 3:14 pm
Hi Sandy
I’m afraid I don’t agree with you. I remember going on a first date and the man turned up in clothes he looked as though he had slept in or would do gardening in. It told me he hadn’t made any sort of effort and wasn’t all that interested in our date. Needless to say when he asked for a second date the answer was no thanks, because the way he was dressed set the tone for the date.