For us ladies it really needs to be a romantic “chick flick” for us to get that snuggle in feeling, which let’s be honest guys is what you are trying to achieve.

So bite the bullet, leave the terminator films at home and rent one of these if you want your date to cuddle in close and get all romantic with you.

Trust me guys, some are actually worth a watch even if you aren’t a “chick”, I have chosen films I think are watchable for men as well as favourites for us women.

Dim the lights, throw some popcorn in the microwave and grab a warm blanket to snuggle under on the sofa, then press play and watch your date melt in your arms.

No 10 – Dr Zhivago

Tells the tale of love found and lost in the turbulent Russian Revolution. Watchable for men because it deals with the choices a man must make between duty, his morals and love. Watchable for women because of the depth of love and passion portrayed.

No 9 – An Officer and a Gentleman

Watchable for men because it has a story to it outside the romantic falling in love scenes, with a look at the angst of a young man trying to better himself by joining the air force.

No 8 – Titanic

Anyone can watch this, it has the true story of that fateful ship and the tragic events that led to so many deaths. It also has the romantic story of two young people falling in love on the cruise then losing each other … keep the tissues handy.

No 7 – Sliding Doors

An unusual film in that you see it twice, each time depending on whether the main character (Gwyneth Paltrow) decides to catch a London train or not. It is a look at fate and how a simple choice can lead us to love and happiness or not.

No 6 – Ladyhawke

One of my all time favourite romantic films, I can watch it again and again. The story is set in the medieval city of Aquila. It has knights and swordfights to keep the guys interested but tells the tale of a knight and his lover that were cursed by a Bishop so they can never see each other in human form. By day the knight travels with his hawk (his cursed lover) and by night she becomes human and he becomes a wolf. Will they ever find a way to lift the curse and be together again?

No 5 – Shrek

It may seem a strange choice but the comedy is fantastic and the fairy tale romance makes us girls long for a big strong man to protect us. We also love the idea that beauty is not paramount when falling in love. It is an animated film about an ogre that reluctantly saves the Princess and of course wins her heart. The donkey (voiced by Eddie Murphy) is where the comedy comes to life.

No 4 – Chocolat

A quirky tale of a woman and her daughter opening a chocolate shop in France and the rigid morality within the village that opposses her. Love arrives in the form of Johnny Depp as a roguish traveller. Not the usual sloppy romantic stuff so easily watchable for men.

No 3 – The Last of the Mohicans

Ask any woman who has seen the film what Daniel Day Lewis says to Madeleine Stowe under the waterfall and she will reply “I will find you”, no matter how long ago she saw the film. There is enough violence and adrenaline to keep the men happy as three trappers try to defend a Colonels daughter but plenty of heart wrenching romance for the girls.

No 2 – When Harry Met Sally

Now come on who hasn’t seen that famous cafe scene where Sally proves how easy it is to fake it?! Men can enjoy this film for it’s comedy but women love the romance. It is the story of two people who have been friends for years and are scared to get involved in case it ruins their friendship. A must see for men and women.

No 1 – Four Weddings and a Funeral

A typical British film, packed with comedy and drama. The title says it all really, it’s about a group of friends that attend four weddings and a funeral. Down to earth look at friendhip, love and that one love that can never be. An absolute must see for everyone.

It was about three years ago, having spent the previous few years alone, that I stumbled upon a dating site while googling some un-remembered and probably weird subject to ease my boredom! It was the ‘Free to join’ and ‘Guaranteed partner within 6 months’ type of statements that had me completing the profile questionnaire with a growing sense of excitement…

My first major lesson was that ‘Free Membership’ was just that… free membership!! It wasn’t free to contact anyone though, or reply to a message or to even participate in the forums! I wasn’t against paying… it was just the misleading banners they used to draw me in that I took offence to! So off I went to find a dating site that that was more suited to my needs.

Now it was time to tackle the profile… sooo many questions and my brain decides right then to have a wee nap and my literary masterpiece becomes nothing more than… “Hi! I’m single. I don’t want to be single. I’m looking for a partner. I’m very interesting. Can you use a washing Machine?”

And then the ‘uploading photos’ part appears and I’m gripped with a fear… HEEEEEELP! If I was going to meet this immensely beautiful woman and it wasn’t going to cost me a penny… then these odd photos that I had littered around my desktop were suddenly quite important! OMG! What pictures do I upload??
Er… this one makes me look totally bald but reasonably muscly!
Ooooh! that one with a false but friendly smile might just do it!
er.. erm…. or I could just Google ‘male model, a quick cut’n'paste and hey presto I’m suddenly gorgeous!

And what the hell am I supposed to put in these boxes that are asking me all about my current lifestyle? I’m bored stiff, feel incredibly lonely and if I could find a life I’d be more than willing to give it some style!

Although I’d say that I was a streetwise type of guy, I have to admit that Computer Dating became an eye-opener! This was a totally different ball-game… a minefield of unexpected stuff like fake-profiles, Scammers and ‘THE MODS’!! What is going on with these weird Moderator People? or should I say PC Police? lol I look at my previous posts sometimes and wonder did I really make a typo like ‘Feck it’? *makes a mental note to replace spell-checker!!

Once over the  hurdles and some valuable lessons had been learnt, it was time for me to find this gorgeous girl who was out in cyberland… I conducted a search for all girls aged between 19 and 20, photo a must and profile must contain words like ‘gagging for it’! My search turned up nothing and I scratched my head in bewilderment… maybe I was being to fussy and tried expanding the age range from 19 to 21!

I tried mailing women who had a pretty face or had saucy profiles but rarely got a reply and the ones I did get were strangely suggesting I needed a personality transplant! I was close to giving up but luckily I had a sudden brain-wave… I’d post something in the forums! Jeeze.. Scary times!! I posted a ‘Hello, I’m new’ kind of thread and very quickly found myself replying to peoples posts! It was awesome and I was amazed at how quickly I made friends… I had been trying too hard, just expecting a female to be attracted to my pic or profile rather than my personality!

Once I had finally got talking to a nice girl, it became time for my next hurdle… THE MEET! Now that really was terrifying! I was aware that I had used only the best possible photos for my profile and that on a very good day I may look a wee bit like them! I headed off to Edinburgh Station feeling sick! This girl was gorgeous, a proper stunner and she was going to be sooo disappointed in me! Why was I putting myself through this hell? Rejection just has to be one of the worst emotions I deal with and here I was setting myself up for a huge kick in the nuts!

I didn’t notice her when all the passengers came teaming from the carriages and nearly had a heart attack when this guy came up to me and announced that he was Shirley! It was only when he spoke that I noticed he had a very high voice… OK maybe it was a female but the facial hair? and where did the lovely white teeth go? In fact this just wasn’t the girl I had seen in the pics! I had no choice but to take her back to mine where we spent a very uncomfortable 3 days in separate bedrooms. I did go on to meet a lovely girl but it was a long-distance relationship and unfortunately didn’t work out after 9 months.

Here’s a few lessons I learnt while using dating sites…

1.  My profile had ‘desperate’ written all over it.
2.  Photo’s are just a rough guide to a persons appearance.
3.  Scammers want to have lots of sexy-time with me.
4.  Mods are from another planet.
5.  MSN/Cam-chat before meeting.
6.  Don’t assume nothing.
7.  Free is not always free.
8.  On first date… Do not arrange for one to stay at the others house.
9.  Use recent photos.
10. Have fun and use the forums.

So to cap it all… It took me a while to find a site that suited me, the forums became a huge help in my search for both friendships and love and most importantly I acquired a whole new section of my life that I am very grateful for! I’ve been a member with Country Couples since January 08 and I’ve yet to find another site that is as friendly and welcoming.

Xander