Sorry to hear youhave been through the pain of an unfaithful partner.

It is possible to get past an affair, not easy but possible and many marriages, if both partners are committed to moving forward together and putting in the hard work, end up much stronger after an affair (that’s not a recommendation for affairs by the way).

Affairs happen for many reasons, sometimes just the thrill of the chemistry with someone new but there are often unresolved problems in the marriage before the affair happens.

The secret to getting past it is to just let it go. It cannot be undone, trust will never be absolute again but we are all human and make mistakes so nobody deserves absolute trust anyway. Holding onto resentment and hurt simply keeps us in the past and stops us enjoying the future.

Nothing in human relationships is ever as cut and dried as a few paragraphs can cover and of course not all relationships are the same but many couples remain monogamous for decades and marriages can last a lifetime .. it’s quite sad that in recent times we seem to be rejecting that idea, self fulfilling prophecy anyone?

As I live on a farm I am fully aware of the Coolidge effect in bulls and rams but I would like to think humans have evolved beyond the rutting desires of farm animals.

I understand the arguments for polygamy and of course it is much more respectful to the other woman than simply having an affair with her but how much respect does it show to your first wife?

It’s a very large subject which I could discuss for hours but as yet I have not made up my mind about … could I accept a second wife? Only in a very limited set of circumstances.

Marriage entails obligations and responsibilities.

What a bizarre way to spend your time and treat your spouse … some people need a hobby.

Some interesting things to think about. I have never had this problem in my marriage, but I know some who have. It seems to me that people also cheat just to see if they can get away with it- almost a intelligence test for their spouse to see how bright they are. They are arrogant enough to think that they can pull if off, even if they don’t necessarily intent to go all the way. They get caught up in the moment and push it until it’s too late to back out. At least, that’s what I’ve seen with a friend of mine.
.-= DeAnn@Cheating Spouse Quiz´s last blog ..Catch Your Cheating Spouse =-.